Before we know it, 4 days have already passed.. but these 4 days didn't seem to have helped anyone much.. From what momo said, kimkim, xiaoyi, edmil, edwin and even yanling cried like the world was ending today and my heart really aches for them.. *sniffs* Somehow, their loss seem to affect me so much to the extent that sometimes, I'm not even sure if I'm crying over gonggong, or over them..
Anyway, I saw gonggong for the last time on Sunday and had a rude shock because I wasn't mentally prepared for what I was going to see.. The person lying there wasn't the smiley 公公 with his trademark sunshine smile that I knew, but someone else I couldn't recognise.. And that was a really painful experience cos I had expected him to have a peaceful, happy expression (like the angelic, calm face people usually describe in books and all that).. Now I know what a big, fat lie that is..
Now, we won't get to eat his yummy chilli maggie mee, hear his voice over the phone, or see him sitting happily by the door on his usual stool, waving to us and flashing his toothy grin anymore..
Now, we won't ever get to see his crinkly smiley face, waving away his birthday gifts bashfully or have him engaging in banter with us anymore..
Perhaps the upside is that at least we got to celebrate CNY and his birthday with him this year.. but there remains simply too much to be said and to be done..
Conclusion
Warm fingertips rest gently on cold glass
Tracing the silhouette of the actor that once graced the stage
His presence is much yearned for
But the lights have dimmed
The curtains drawn
And him unhearing, unseeing, unfeeling
The black curtains are unmoving
Despite desperate cries for encores
And so we know the show has ended
Really ended
The audience have also cleared out one by one
Leaving behind an empty stage
Empty seats
Empty hearts
With only the movie still rolling silently in black and white
For anyone to come back and reminisce
The good times and the bad
The show may have been muted
But I hear so much
A theatre celebrating the life that has been lived
A theatre mourning the inevitable finale
The silent noise
Speaking volumes about the love this actor has received
The show may have ended
But he will be etched in their memories forever
